***Ofishul Darwin Award Nominee Mega Thread***

[Stinger_1066]

Lets get started with a nominee from the great state of Oklahoma - Barry Lester:

People who handle a lot of snakes will sooner or later be bitten — snake wranglers accept the fact that any bite might be their last — and that was the end for Barry Lester who died during a day outdoors, celebrating his 57th birthday on Sunday.

He had picked up many snakes over the years and always avoided getting bit — and always warned others they should never do as he did — according to his wife, Roberta Lester.

He picked up a timber rattlesnake in Osage County that was crossing the road as the pair traveled back roads on the way to Walnut Creek, a tributary of Keystone Lake.

http://newsok.com/wife-of-man-killed...rticle/5593422

[Stinger_1066]

Bump for snakes.

[StoopTroup]

I thought this was already going in the Dachshund Thread?

[lvfarmer2]

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/arti...nake-bite.html

[Slytherin]

Lets get started with a nominee from the great state of Oklahoma - Barry Lester:



http://newsok.com/wife-of-man-killed...rticle/5593422

Hardly Darwin material. Dumb? I guess, but nowhere near Darwinesque. Now if you said it bit him on his dick while he was trying to fuck it? That would be Darwinesque. Step up your game stingray.

[Mazeppa]

Mother changes son's name after botched tattoo spells it wrong

"Kevin," the two-year-old son of Johanna Sandstrom, of Sweden, was renamed "Kelvin" after a tattoo artist inked the wrong name on her arm.

"I had never heard the name 'Kelvin' before," she said. "There isn’t anyone who names their kid Kelvin. So when I thought more about it, I realized that no one else has this name. It became unique. Now we think it is better than Kevin."

http://www.foxnews.com/world/2018/05...-it-wrong.html

She's right, I've never heard of anyone named Kelvin.

[Pokej]

Mother changes son's name after botched tattoo spells it wrong

"Kevin," the two-year-old son of Johanna Sandstrom, of Sweden, was renamed "Kelvin" after a tattoo artist inked the wrong name on her arm.

"I had never heard the name 'Kelvin' before," she said. "There isn’t anyone who names their kid Kelvin. So when I thought more about it, I realized that no one else has this name. It became unique. Now we think it is better than Kevin."

http://www.foxnews.com/world/2018/05...-it-wrong.html

She's right, I've never heard of anyone named Kelvin.

That’s Calvin.

[Stinger_1066]

That’s Calvin.

I thought his name was Cellvin Samsung.

[traxx]

Mother changes son's name after botched tattoo spells it wrong

"Kevin," the two-year-old son of Johanna Sandstrom, of Sweden, was renamed "Kelvin" after a tattoo artist inked the wrong name on her arm.

"I had never heard the name 'Kelvin' before," she said. "There isn’t anyone who names their kid Kelvin. So when I thought more about it, I realized that no one else has this name. It became unique. Now we think it is better than Kevin."

http://www.foxnews.com/world/2018/05...-it-wrong.html

She's right, I've never heard of anyone named Kelvin.

Left out of the article is that Joanna Sandstorm changed her name to Johanna Sandstrom when a tattoo artist spelled her name wrong.

[StoopTroup]

Kevin and Kelvin Suck?

[Mr_Robot_ulism]

I would like to submit my entry:

https://www.godlikeproductions.com/f...age3864642/pg1

[KCRuf/Nek]

Terrifying video: Woman hand-feeding sharks bitten, dragged into water

http://www.kmbc.com/article/terrifyi...water/22016241

[Percy]

Terrifying video: Woman hand-feeding sharks bitten, dragged into water

http://www.kmbc.com/article/terrifyi...water/22016241

Feeding a shark? What could possibly go wrong?
She's lucky all she got out of the situation was boo-boo on her finger.

[KCRuf/Nek]

Feeding a shark? What could possibly go wrong?
She's lucky all she got out of the situation was boo-boo on her finger.

Not just feeding a shark but basically putting it in its mouth.

[Percy]

Not just feeding a shark but basically putting it in its mouth.

She acted like she was feeding a puppy dog.

On the bright side, she has a nice can.

[Stinger_1066]

Credit goes to Mazeppa for finding this one. A trifecta. A hat trick, if you will.

[Mazeppa]

Not just feeding a shark but basically putting it in its mouth.

Nurse Sharks usually feed on bottom and take in their prey with a powerful sucking action, that's why you shouldn't get your hands too close to it's mouth if you are feeding it.

[MikeLucky]

She acted like she was feeding a puppy dog.

On the bright side, she has a nice can.

I wasn't going to watch the video until I saw this post... Then I watched.

Credit goes to Mazeppa for finding this one. A trifecta. A hat trick, if you will.

Damn, she must have had some seriously good poon... Both those dudes jumped to their death without thinking to save that shit.

[KCRuf/Nek]

powerful sucking action

Are you still talking about the sharks?

[Mazeppa]

Are you still talking about the sharks?

Yeah, because I don't know her and what her talents are.

[Mazeppa]

Man who fell to his death was thrill-seeker who shared snaps of his adventures on social media



A man who allegedly fell to his death from a six-story building in New York City on Thursday was a thrill-seeker who often posted pictures of his adventures to social media.

Jackson Coe, 25, was found dead in the back of a building in West Village, Manhattan, on Thursday morning, the New York City Police Department said. He suffered injuries “consistent with a fall,” police said.

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2018/07/07...ial-media.html

[Mazeppa]

[Mazeppa]

Lions eat rhino poachers on South African game reserve

JOHANNESBURG (Reuters) - At least two rhino poachers were eaten by lions on a South African game reserve, the owner of the lodge said on Thursday.

A ranger taking guests at the Sibuya Game Reserve in the Eastern Cape on a safari drive on Tuesday afternoon discovered human remains close to a pride of lions.

"We suspect two were killed, possibly three," Sibuya owner Nick Fox said.

https://www.investing.com/news/world...ontent=2261506

[Not2121]

Credit goes to Mazeppa for finding this one. A trifecta. A hat trick, if you will.

“Don’t go chasing waterfalls, just stick to the rivers and the lakes that you YouTube”
~Anthony Jeselnik

[KCRuf/Nek]

Lions eat rhino poachers on South African game reserve

JOHANNESBURG (Reuters) - At least two rhino poachers were eaten by lions on a South African game reserve, the owner of the lodge said on Thursday.

A ranger taking guests at the Sibuya Game Reserve in the Eastern Cape on a safari drive on Tuesday afternoon discovered human remains close to a pride of lions.

"We suspect two were killed, possibly three," Sibuya owner Nick Fox said.

https://www.investing.com/news/world...ontent=2261506

[KCRuf/Nek]

Anyone going to watch that fool try to jump the fountains at Caesars?

[Stinger_1066]

Lions eat rhino poachers on South African game reserve

JOHANNESBURG (Reuters) - At least two rhino poachers were eaten by lions on a South African game reserve, the owner of the lodge said on Thursday.

A ranger taking guests at the Sibuya Game Reserve in the Eastern Cape on a safari drive on Tuesday afternoon discovered human remains close to a pride of lions.

"We suspect two were killed, possibly three," Sibuya owner Nick Fox said.

https://www.investing.com/news/world...ontent=2261506

Hopefully one of them was a certain dentist from Minnesota.

[Mazeppa]

Indiana woman, girlfriend used marijuana as incentive for boy's behavior, court records show



An Indiana woman and her girlfriend gave her son marijuana dozens of times in the last three months as a reward for the boy’s good behavior, court records stated.

Susan Glascock and Melissa Burton, both 36, were charged with child neglect after the boy told police he was being rewarded with marijuana for his good behavior and had the drug taken away when he was behaving badly, FOX59 reported.

Police began investigating the family on June 25 when officers responded to a disturbance at the home in Greenfield. Glascock was upset about the amount of money the boy and his mother, Burton, was receiving by selling video games, court documents stated.

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2018/07/08...ords-show.html

[Mazeppa]

Woman accused of selling meth in Magoffin courtroom while waiting for judge to appear



Salyersville Three people are behind bars after one woman allegedly tried to sell methamphetamine in a Magoffin County courtroom.
Telby Fields, 24, of Mount Olive, Kentucky, was in court on Monday, July 2, for a scheduled court date in an earlier 2018 case in which she was charged with third-degree terroristic threatening. While sitting in the back waiting for the judge to appear, Fields reportedly asked at least three other people waiting in the courtroom if they would be interested in buying methamphetamine from her.
A security officer overheard the transactions and told Magoffin County Sheriff Department Detective Neil Adams.
Adams, followed Fields out of the courthouse, walking around the building to the Church Street side, and witnessed her running down the breezeway that leads to the parking lot behind the courthouse. She reportedly dove into the back of a car parked there and laid down in the back seat.


https://www.kentucky.com/latest-news...214472069.html

[tennsooner]

Credit goes to Mazeppa for finding this one. A trifecta. A hat trick, if you will.

Yep I figure fuck them. They messed with the bull and they got the horns. I don't feel a damn bit sorry for them.

[Mr_Robot_ulism]

Indiana woman, girlfriend used marijuana as incentive for boy's behavior, court records show



An Indiana woman and her girlfriend gave her son marijuana dozens of times in the last three months as a reward for the boy’s good behavior, court records stated.

Susan Glascock and Melissa Burton, both 36, were charged with child neglect after the boy told police he was being rewarded with marijuana for his good behavior and had the drug taken away when he was behaving badly, FOX59 reported.

Police began investigating the family on June 25 when officers responded to a disturbance at the home in Greenfield. Glascock was upset about the amount of money the boy and his mother, Burton, was receiving by selling video games, court documents stated.

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2018/07/08...ords-show.html

Think the other's last name should be Glascock...fits better

[Slytherin]

Indiana woman, girlfriend used marijuana as incentive for boy's behavior, court records show



An Indiana woman and her girlfriend gave her son marijuana dozens of times in the last three months as a reward for the boy’s good behavior, court records stated.

Susan Glascock and Melissa Burton, both 36, were charged with child neglect after the boy told police he was being rewarded with marijuana for his good behavior and had the drug taken away when he was behaving badly, FOX59 reported.

Police began investigating the family on June 25 when officers responded to a disturbance at the home in Greenfield. Glascock was upset about the amount of money the boy and his mother, Burton, was receiving by selling video games, court documents stated.

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2018/07/08...ords-show.html

Hillary voters. Who wants to bet?

[Mazeppa]

Hillary voters. Who wants to bet?

Nailed it, probably obama too.

[traxx]

Indiana woman, girlfriend used marijuana as incentive for boy's behavior, court records show



An Indiana woman and her girlfriend gave her son marijuana dozens of times in the last three months as a reward for the boy’s good behavior, court records stated.

Susan Glascock and Melissa Burton, both 36, were charged with child neglect after the boy told police he was being rewarded with marijuana for his good behavior and had the drug taken away when he was behaving badly, FOX59 reported.

Police began investigating the family on June 25 when officers responded to a disturbance at the home in Greenfield. Glascock was upset about the amount of money the boy and his mother, Burton, was receiving by selling video games, court documents stated.

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2018/07/08...ords-show.html

That's supposed to be a female on the right? I thought it was a dude.

[SoonerBounce13]

Some of you guys are doing this thread wrong

[VUGear]

She's right, I've never heard of anyone named Kelvin.

Lord Kelvin is not pleased with you.

[Mazeppa]

Lord Kelvin is not pleased with you.

You right sure that's not John Brown?

[Mazeppa]

Some of you guys are doing this thread wrong

Que?

[SoonerBounce13]

Que?

People are posting stories of people that did not die.
The Darwin Award is for those that did something stupid and died from it

[Mazeppa]

People are posting stories of people that did not die.
The Darwin Award is for those that did something stupid and died from it

So it's about stupid dead people? Got it.

[KCRuf/Nek]

People are posting stories of people that did not die.
The Darwin Award is for those that did something stupid and died from it

You don't have to die. You just have to put yourself in a dangerous situation by doing something stupid. Death just kicks it up a notch or two.

Bad parenting does not qualify for a Darwin award.

[MikeLucky]

You don't have to die. You just have to put yourself in a dangerous situation by doing something stupid. Death just kicks it up a notch or two.

Bad parenting does not qualify for a Darwin award.

The project became more formalized with the creation of a website in 1993, and followed up by a series of books starting in 2000, authored by Wendy Northcutt. The criterion for the awards states, "In the spirit of Charles Darwin, the Darwin Awards commemorate individuals who protect our gene pool by making the ultimate sacrifice of their own lives. Darwin Award winners eliminate themselves in an extraordinarily idiotic manner, thereby improving our species' chances of long-term survival."^[2]

Accidental self-sterilization also qualifies; however, the site notes: "Of necessity, the award is usually bestowed posthumously." The candidate is disqualified, though, if "innocent bystanders", who might have contributed positively to the gene pool, are killed in the process.

Death or sterilization.

[Mixer!]

Bad parenting does not qualify for a Darwin award.

Bad parenting/lack thereof that results indirectly in a child's death? Clarification, please.

[KCRuf/Nek]

Bad parenting/lack thereof that results indirectly in a child's death? Clarification, please.

I was referring to the above posts concerning the son being given weed that seemed to derail the thread. We need moar women in bikinis feeding sharks.

[Mixer!]

..so there was a 16 year old kid in Tampa that died because he held a mortar style firework in his hand, and it shot out the bottom of the tube hitting him in the heart and lung. Stupid, yes; but I feel a twinge of guilt posting a DAW story for a minor.

[keef]

..so there was a 16 year old kid in Tampa that died because he held a mortar style firework in his hand, and it shot out the bottom of the tube hitting him in the heart and lung. Stupid, yes; but I feel a twinge of guilt posting a DAW story for a minor.

“Feel”?

[Stinger_1066]

..so there was a 16 year old kid in Tampa that died because he held a mortar style firework in his hand, and it shot out the bottom of the tube hitting him in the heart and lung. Stupid, yes; but I feel a twinge of guilt posting a DAW story for a minor.

That is a perfect example of a Darwin Award nominee. He eliminated himself from the gene pool. I'm assuming he had not yet sired any offspring.

[Stinger_1066]

The project became more formalized with the creation of a website in 1993, and followed up by a series of books starting in 2000, authored by Wendy Northcutt. The criterion for the awards states, "In the spirit of Charles Darwin, the Darwin Awards commemorate individuals who protect our gene pool by making the ultimate sacrifice of their own lives. Darwin Award winners eliminate themselves in an extraordinarily idiotic manner, thereby improving our species' chances of long-term survival."^[2]

Accidental self-sterilization also qualifies; however, the site notes: "Of necessity, the award is usually bestowed posthumously." The candidate is disqualified, though, if "innocent bystanders", who might have contributed positively to the gene pool, are killed in the process.

Death or sterilization.

They should probably exclude anyone who has already procreated.

[StroudSooner]

Lions eat rhino poachers on South African game reserve

JOHANNESBURG (Reuters) - At least two rhino poachers were eaten by lions on a South African game reserve, the owner of the lodge said on Thursday.

A ranger taking guests at the Sibuya Game Reserve in the Eastern Cape on a safari drive on Tuesday afternoon discovered human remains close to a pride of lions.

"We suspect two were killed, possibly three," Sibuya owner Nick Fox said.

https://www.investing.com/news/world...ontent=2261506

Animals win!

[Mazeppa]

Married woman and mechanic die from carbon monoxide poisoning while having sex in garage: report



A married woman and her mechanic lover reportedly died from apparent carbon monoxide poisoning while having sex in a parking garage.

Kahali Johnson found his wife, Tameka Hargrave, 39, and the 56-year-old mechanic, who was not identified, dead in a parking garage on Monday night in Newark, N.J., ABC 7 New York reported.

Johnson was paying for work done on her vehicle by having sex with the mechanic, a police source told NJ.com.

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2018/07/11...ge-report.html